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The other guy who had helped him lift my oxygen tent pipes in, "I got one real quick question and then I'll let you die. I'm broke and unhealthy. I can't get a woman and haven't gotten laid in 7 years. My life is completely dysfunctional and in chaos. I've also got a problem with…

Then, in the background, I hear the other guys in the room begging, "Gary, I've got a question too." And someone else pleading, "Gary, it's just a really quick one."

My eyes are darting around frantically to find the call button. I push it with all the strength I have left. The doctor and several nurses come rushing…

With what little bit of dying breath I have left, I whisper, "No. I don't need any of that. What I DO need is for you to get all these shitweasels away from me so I can die in peace!"

Well, that's it for today. But you better read the next installment... because... in that one...

I Am Going To Tell You EXACTLY

What You Have To Do... If... You Want To Make

As Much As One Hundred Million Dollars... And...

You Want To Make It Really, Really Fast!

But, unfortunately, I am NOT going to tell you how to get rid of all your demons... because... I do not yet know how to get rid…

# Night Before Christmas

Dear Friend
& Subscriber,

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, so I took off her blouse.

Her stockings were hung by the chimney with care

In the hopes the rest of her clothes soon would be there.

When up on on the roof, I heard such a clatter

I pulled my hand from her bra to see what was the matter.

And there on the rooftop...

Ah nuts... I
can't go on. I'm not suffering from "writer's block"...
but... I am suffering…

As you know, I
just finished my "All The New Secrets I Have Discovered About How To Write Sales
Messages Which Produce Huge And Automatic Profits!"
seminar which I held in Phoenix a few days ago. I gave that
audience everything I had to give. It was the best seminar
I've ever given in my life... and... the audience…

And now, I'm
packing up to fly a few thousand miles to be with my family for
the holidays.

So,
I'm going to indulge myself a little this month and not write a
newsletter. I suggest you do the same... indulge yourself a little
this month, "close up shop" for a few days and spend
time with your…

Happy Holidays And

Go Enjoy Time With The

Special
Ones In YOUR Life!!

Sincerely,

Gary C. Halbert

Gary
C. Halbert

P.S.

I'm
gonna come roaring out of the gate on January 2... so...
you better be ready, Buckwheat!.

Peace.

# Report Slow Down Stop Reverse Aging

Dear Friend & Subscriber,

I guess for you to fully understand
this issue of my newsletter,
I'm going to have to reveal
unto you a little-known secret
about myself.

Some years ago in Los Angeles,
I was rather thoroughly examined
by a psychiatrist and a team
of psychologists. They discovered,
just like with everyone else,
there are certain things a
bit different about me which
set me apart from other people.
Most of those differences
are not all that radical.
But, they discovered one particular
difference about me which…

I, Sir Gary Of Halbert,

Attach
Less Importance To Money

Than
Anyone Else They Had Ever
Examined!

Don't get me wrong. I do
think money is important.
However, I think about money
the same way I think about
oxygen. In other words, I
believe we all need oxygen...
but... once you have a sufficient
amount of it... having more…

Truer words were never spoken,
neither here nor in Hoboken.

Well, as fascinating as I'm
sure all this is to you, why
am I telling you about it?
What the hell does it have
to do with anything?
I beg thee Sire, pray let
me explain. I have been selling
a report for $97.00 per copy
entitled...

Gary Halbert's
Report On

How
To Slow Down, Stop And Even
Reverse

The
Aging Process And Regain And
Increase

All
The Youthful Energy, Vitality
And

Sexual
Passion You Once Enjoyed!

The information in that report
will not only slow down and/or
alleviate the aging process...
in many cases... it will reverse
it. When Theresa (my Trusty
Assistant for…

"Yes," she responded,
"but... it only pertains
to men. For men, it's incredible
life-changing information.
But, you've never written
anything at all like this
of equal value for women!"

Why haven't I? It's simply
I don't know of any information
like this which would be of
equal value for a woman.

But, this got me to thinking:
You know how, in days of old,
sailors would often get a
deadly disease called "scurvy"
when they went on long voyages?
Remember how it was discovered
this was caused by a lack
of Vitamin C... and how...
the disease could be completely
eradicated if only the sailors
would eat some fruit while
on…

OK, what if sailors were still
dying from lack of Vitamin
C... and... you were
one of the very few...
who knew... simply taking
limes with them on their voyages
would save much suffering
and many lives? What would
you charge those sailors to
impart unto them that life-saving
info? As far as I'm concerned,
that info would…

So, why have I been charging
$97.00 for the most important
life-changing info I've ever
written and published?

Because I'm a jerk. The truth
is, the information in that
report I've been selling...
is far too valuable to
withhold from anyone!
So, what have I done with
all those $97.00 checks I've
received…

And, right here in this issue
of this newsletter... at no
charge to anybody... I have
decided to reprint the entire
contents of that incredibly
valuable report. It starts
on the next page. Read it
immediately. It will
change your life.

Gary
Halbert's
Report On

How
To Slow Down,

stop
And Even Reverse

The
Aging Process
And

Regain
And Increase
All The

Youthful
Energy, Vitality

And
Sexual Passion

You
Once Enjoyed!

Copyright
2000
by Gary
C. Halbert
t
Cherrywood
Publishing